International Asexuality Day: Three Ways to Be an Ally to the Asexual Community

International Asexuality Day (IAD) takes place every April 6 as a worldwide effort to recognize the asexuality community and promote understanding of the asexual spectrum, including asexual, demisexual and greysexual individuals. Asexual people have a diverse range of experiences and contributions, and IAD helps those aspects of asexuality be seen authentically. Below are just a few things you can do to be an ally to asexuals or “aces.”

1. Educate Yourself

Although IAD has only been in existence since 2021, asexuality has been around just as long as other sexual identities. The asexual spectrum, abbreviated as acespec, refers to a wide umbrella of sexual orientations including, but not limited to:

• Asexual: experience little to no sexual attraction to others. Aces can experience other forms of attraction, like romantic, sensual or aesthetic attraction, and can still engage in sexual activity if they choose to for various reasons despite not feeling sexual desire.
• Demisexual: only experience sexual attraction once they form a strong emotional connection with another person. Demisexuals may not experience primary sexual attraction based on sight, scent or other instantly available information, but could experience secondary sexual attraction after learning more about someone.
• Greysexual: characterized by being asexual while also being able to experience or have previously experienced sexual attraction. This could appear in sexual attraction that is low in intensity, infrequent, ambiguous or only direction toward specific people.

You can find more information on various asexuality identities under the umbrella at GLAAD’s Glossary of Terms.

2. Celebrate Your Ace Friends

One of the most impactful ways to provide visibility to the asexual community is to celebrate the aces in your life. Whether they are out or now, people on the ace spectrum deal with misconceptions and judgments about asexuality. Providing space for the asexual community validates their feelings surrounding sex and serves as a reminder that aces are just as deserving of love and acceptance as anyone else.

3. Advocate for Asexual People

Asexual people have faced dismissal from both outside and within the LGBTQIA+ community as simply choosing to not have sex, feeding into the narrative that sexuality (or lack thereof) is a choice. And while gay and bi people have seen a rise in representation within media in recent years, asexual people don’t often see themselves in the books, movies and shows, and their depictions are usually fleeting.

Advocating for accurate and authentic representation of asexual people in media to show that love doesn’t equal sex. Asexual people can experience meaningful and fulfilling relationships without desire to maintain a sexual relationship, and they deserve to be seen and heard.

To find local connections and resources check out the Seattle Aces & Aros website: SeattleAcesAndAros.org